I'm sorry to tell you

But it is difficult to field diagnose a tension pneumothorax without a BP cuff, vitals or SAMPLE/OPQRST history. Did you even get his name?

When generously sharing animal crackers

you should always hand a classmate the butt...

Classmate 1: "Here is the butt-end. You can have it."
Classmate 2: "Assman"

Rocking the house

For the first time in my adult life, I found myself hosting an unexpected and unplanned party at my pad.

I can say it here, I love my EMT lab group. They're beyond awesome.

We'd gone to the bar to celebrate the belated birthday of one of the guys, but unknown to us, the bar closed at 10 that night. We'd only intended to drink a couple beers, then go home as we either had work or school (in my case a histology test) in the morning. 10 o'clock rolled around and we decided we'd not have enough fun, so two beers in I said "Hey! I only live six miles from here!"

So, directions were given, phone numbers exchanged and we all headed out. We took a detour to help one gal unload her car then met back at my house with whatever adult beverages we could scrounge up. Madness ensued. Hide and go seek in the yard at 3 am, complete with very drunken hand-to-hand from yours truly (I lost spectacularly to a former rugby playing bouncer who outweighs me by 100lbs) and traditional face painting of the first drunk to fall asleep on my floor. Silence descended around 6 am and when I woke at 10:30 my house was empty and the plethora of empty beer bottles, the half empty bottle of rum and whisky, the top-less bottle of taquila and the poured but undrunk glass of mead was the only evidence that anyone was here.

I decided that the morning after headache was due to falling against the metal frame of my bed. But on the upside, I got an 87,5% on my histology test. I consider that damn good as I was having trouble focusing my eyes.

World, watch out for class of 2013.