Reason 651 I should...

Not wear jeans, t-shirt, work jacket and baseball cap with my hair braided back:

Evidently I look like a boy. As in "Good morning, sir, how can I ... Oh, I mean, good morning, miss. Can I help you with your bag?"

Almost the end...

Meeting up with the last of my classmates that have to pass the Readiness exam today, to help them study. They have one chance to pass it (and the class) and since passing is required to take the NREMT-B we're gonna knuckle down.

Tomorrow I have my A&P final, so I need to review that as well. Yay for action potentials and calcium (has to do with muscles, I know that much) and the endocrine system. But hey! Then it's break!!

I can't wait to dig my snowboard out of storage, and take Shortie sledding. I'm so EXCITED!

Busy week

Hey! It's Saturday! Welcome to the weekend!

Monday was fun. I scored well on my last chapters test of my EMT book (89%!!) then spent AAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL day Tuesday reviewing for the skills practical of my registry exam. My class and I (six of us total) down a 12 pack of Mountain Dew, a 6 pack of pepsi, untold number of sodas/energy drinks from the vending machine and a bag full of candy and snacks. It was fun. Then we took our test - and we ALL passed. Even me!

Wednesday was the highlight of the week, with three major tests (one of which was scheduled for next week!!) but it ended well. I passed my anatomy lab practical on nervous and endocrine tissue, despite thinking that all the slides looked exactly the same. I also passed my surprise final, which wasn't as hard as I thought it'd be, and it saves me a trip into school next week.

But the best part of all? I rocked my Readiness Exam for EMT. We had to have a 70% minimum to pass. I took the cake with 84% and then we all went to Applebees for happy hour.

I think I slept most of Thursday after watching LotR and other movies all night at a friends. Thursday night was a repeat as we finished LotR FotR and TTT, then watched Clash of the Titans (twice, as we got distracted talking and it replayed) and crashed out to King Arthur sometime around dawn.

Then I found out my little brother, who I haven't seen in more than a year, is going to come TONIGHT to see me. Then I'm giving him a ride out to his rig...can you say ROAD TRIP?

All in all, it's been a lovely-if slightly stressful week. Only one more test and it's Christmas Break!

No shit, really?

Prehospital Emergency Care, 9th Edition

Chapter 41, Page 1347

"The ambulance is the vehicle that brings care to the patient in times of emergency and transports the patient to a medical receiving facility for follow-up care. It is a crucial part of the EMS system."





Really? REALLY??? 1347 pages in and you're just telling me what an ambulance is?

Oh, and EMS system is redundant.

Wander Woman

Led me in circles around the ER on Thanksgiving.

But you know, it was all good. She was a total sweetheart, an absolute doll. We didn't believe the medic's when they reported that she'd been skipping down the hall in her nursing home, and they transported her because she fell while doing so. However, after an hour and a half of walking (mainly because we were too kind to lock her in a room) we decided that this sweet, old woman with dementia could very well have been skipping down the halls.

The rest of the clinicals were interesting. CHF who fell off his scooter in the Walmart parking lot. Little girl who caught her hand in a bullet blender. Infected toenail removal. All in a day's work in the ER.

The BLS transport was good too. I got to watch a woman (as we transferred her from the ER to our cot to take her home) go into severe respiratory distress and get nebbed. Her SpO2 stats dropped from mid nineties to thirty in two minutes. We decided she wasn't stable enough to transport. And ran. Fast.

Had a crazy woman. She wanted to take me home, which was kinda weird. She didn't like guys so I ended up keeping her calm and distracted during the ride to the hospital. We no more than dropped her off than picked up a baby with respiratory distress and took her to the Children's Hospital. She was adorable, other than the wheezing and coughing. Very happy baby over all, which we decided was a good thing. Last two patients were non-ambulatory, which meant I got to practice lifting and moving. My preceptor was bitten- not hard, but he definitely bit her. And I learned how to move in the back of a moving ambulance. That's a slightly unnerving feeling, especially when the patient I'm trying not to bump, jar or fall on complains of the slightest movement.

Ah well. Clinicals are over, I lived. And learned a lot. It was fun.

Quote of the day: MRSA

"MRSA- It’s gone rogue. It’s the Sarah Palin of bacteria."

Physics lesson in EMT-B

1/2mv^2= Kinetic Energy.....yes? Somewhere I learned that once.

Today I learned just why that matters.

I'm never driving above 15mph again. Never, ever.

Teres....something or other.

Two muscles, on two seperate stations. I swear they were both either teres major, or teres minor.

At least I spelled platysma right...

Thoughts and Prayers

Found out tonight that our EMT-Basic professor is in ICU with pneumonia. Never a good thing, and double bad now.

Get well soon!

A little lost lately

So, Nanowrimo started. It's taken up an insane amount of my time.

I also had big tests (more in a week.5) and our normal prof had thyroid surgery so not even class is giving me much to write about. However, I get to sign up for clinicals, which will probably give me some new insights. Ah well. I haven't deserted my writing, it's just a bit behind due to my Nano. I'll get back in the saddle when I'm caught up on writing/homework/studying/clinicals/project or...December.

Initial Impressions of Messed-up Mental Patients

"Your general impression of the patient is a big deal.

*flash image on screen*

Big man, big stick- See ya, Bye!"

Head, meet desk

So, I'm filling out paperwork for my clinicals, turning in my immunization record and I see this:

If you have not had  an annual TST (tuberculin skin test), the 2 Step Test is REQUIRED.

If the first result is negative,  a second test must be done 1-3 weeks later.

No big deal, right?

It is a big deal. I HAVE to turn this in by Monday. Term started in August, and we were told to get our Mantoux done, so we all went out and got one. ONE. That's what our syllabus, professor and EHS website told us to do.

That was MONTHS ago. Shit like this makes me want to strangle people.

When generously sharing animal crackers

you should always hand a classmate the butt...

Classmate 1: "Here is the butt-end. You can have it."
Classmate 2: "Assman"

In regards to back-boarding...

"When there is man-cleavage, I think it's tight enough."

Cardio test!

75%

So far, one of the highest scores!

Zombies Everywhere!!

So, last night was the seventh annual Zombie Pub Crawl in Minneapolis, MN (and St. Paul!). From four pm until dawn probably, there were thousands of rotting, bleeding, moaning and very drunk zombie's running amuck in the capital.

And of course, I was in the middle of it.

I went with a couple of my EMT classmates...

And we zombie shuffled into the other city to meet up with yet another zombie classmate...

On the upside, it seems to be a one night only type zombie infection. It might take longer to actually remove the make-up (my ears are still white. It's kinda weird) and fake blood (ever heard the phrase "caught red handed"? I can verify it is possible, and will be until this dye wears off!) and I think the shirt is a total loss.

EMT Class

"When the electricity goes back and forth sixty times in a second, the heart goes "WTF?" and fibrillates."
        In reference to why one should not stick their finger in a light socket

Rocking the house

For the first time in my adult life, I found myself hosting an unexpected and unplanned party at my pad.

I can say it here, I love my EMT lab group. They're beyond awesome.

We'd gone to the bar to celebrate the belated birthday of one of the guys, but unknown to us, the bar closed at 10 that night. We'd only intended to drink a couple beers, then go home as we either had work or school (in my case a histology test) in the morning. 10 o'clock rolled around and we decided we'd not have enough fun, so two beers in I said "Hey! I only live six miles from here!"

So, directions were given, phone numbers exchanged and we all headed out. We took a detour to help one gal unload her car then met back at my house with whatever adult beverages we could scrounge up. Madness ensued. Hide and go seek in the yard at 3 am, complete with very drunken hand-to-hand from yours truly (I lost spectacularly to a former rugby playing bouncer who outweighs me by 100lbs) and traditional face painting of the first drunk to fall asleep on my floor. Silence descended around 6 am and when I woke at 10:30 my house was empty and the plethora of empty beer bottles, the half empty bottle of rum and whisky, the top-less bottle of taquila and the poured but undrunk glass of mead was the only evidence that anyone was here.

I decided that the morning after headache was due to falling against the metal frame of my bed. But on the upside, I got an 87,5% on my histology test. I consider that damn good as I was having trouble focusing my eyes.

World, watch out for class of 2013.

Stories from class

Paramedic: "Ma'am, are you in any pain?"
Lady: *gasp* "Nooooooooooooooooooooo."
Paramedic: "Are you having trouble breathing?"
Lady: *gasp* "Noooooooooooooooooooooo."

Prof: "Bullshit. She was having trouble breathing."

Rebreather Masks

"Assembling regulator...checking for pressure and...s-s-s-s....seepage?"

"Leaks"

"Yeah, leekages. Assembling rebreather mask..."

What I think about in class...

A darkened room,

One soft light

Shadows move

Into the night

A voice booms

From the dark

Loud and shattering

And on the mark

Darker blobs

In midnight blue

Staring ahead

Focus so true

Shadow’s shift

The scene is changed

Bodies stir

The room arranged

The voice again

Does not disappoint

A slide clicks over

Death by power-point

**Just to clarify- I do pay attention as well, and even take notes.

Anatomy quote of the day

"If you think you may be falling in love, it may be just that they smell really good."

My gulper is broked!!

"The epiglottis is a flap of cartilaginious tissue that covers the opening of the larynx, known as the glottic opening, during swallowing."

Seriously, I can translate this into a much easier sentence to read.

"The gulper keeps food out of your lungs when you swallow."

Epiglottis my ass. Sounds like some bum-fuck disease you get from not bathing. On the other hand, it is kinda fun to say. I'm not attempting to say cartilaginious out loud. I'll just know what it means.

I wonder...

If I'd have turned this paper in, would I have gotten a 10/10?

And since, as a college student turning in said paper that DID get a 10/10...how horrible must the rest of them been to get statistics such as this:

(Now, I -was- trying to fit it on one page but still...My hs teacher would have kicked me if I'd have turned it in. Ah well. A 10's a 10.)

Rats

10/10 on my Rat Anatomy Quiz...

...Except she took very vague "The duodenum is *point in general direction and touch a portion of the gut* that." as me knowing where it was. I had no flipping idea, since it wasn't on our chart or study list.

She also moved on before I could move stuff around to point to the aorta. But on the upside, I DO know what and where that is.

Ahhh, community colleges...

Pronunciation

Pah-tay-to? Pah-tah-to?

Tah-mah-to? To-may-to?

Kelt-ic? Sel-tic?

I can live with pah-tah-to and tah-mah-to, but unless you're talking about the basketball team, please, it's Kelt-tic.

Weekly Recap

Well, it's been exactly one week since I went to bed excited/terrified/exhausted awaiting the start of a new school year.

Some things I have learned:
    1. I have the capacity to be a class clown.
    2. I rather like it.
    3. Telling your classmates to lean on a door that opens into a room instead of out of it is not a brilliant idea.
    4. Dissecting rats is fun, even if I'm certain living guts don't feel like that.
    5. A textbook that quotes Tolkien is awesome. A textbook that quote Tolkien twice, and manages to incorporate Celtic lore while doing so is actually worth reading
    6. My figment believes that the EMS in the States is simply an improved version of her riding back to Helm's Deep with half-dead riders semi-field-treated and slung over her horse.

*scratches head*

1) An Emergency Medical Responder (EMR) approaches you and states that he is interested in becoming an EMT. Specifically, he asks what he will be able to do as an EMT that he cannot presently do as an EMR. You should respond by saying he will not: A) obtain vital signs. B) administer some medications. 
C) perform emergency childbirth. 
D) use an automated external defibrillator.



If my book has anything to say about it (which, incidently it does) an EMT will do ALL of these things. An EMR can't administer medications (maybe Epi pens?). So am I just reading this wrong and the prof is asking what on the list can the EMR not do now that he will be able to do as an EMT?

EMT Class

My prof just said "bad ju-ju".

OMG

Ah class...

There is nothing like jumping into things head first. I'm only taking three classes this sem; I say only but I've managed to find myself with 16 credits (12 credits is considered a full load). I am however, looking forward to getting started.

I get to start the day off with Anatomy & Physiology 1 (Wednesday labs!) on Monday, Wednesdays and Fridays. I've been reading ahead because there are so many new terms. We'll see if it pays off. Second class is Psychology of Death and Dying. Sounds properly gloomy, but my textbook did quote Lord of the Rings (book, not movie!) and I was dutifully impressed. Any textbook that quotes LoTR gets a star in my book. I've only that twice a week, for which I'm glad. I enjoy psych in general, but not as a class. I get annoyed by them, more often than not.

Monda thru Wednesday I have my EMT Basic Cert course. I'm really excited about it, and slightly terrified. I think the textbook weighs more than I do, but it is fascinating. It's a evening course though, so I don't get out of class until almost 10 PM. As a night owl, I don't particularly mind, except for the fact that I start my class day at 11 AM.

After you factor in 1/2 hour driving both ways it's...a long day. But it should be fun.

We are supposed to set up clinical hours for the EMT course this week, either at the local hospital, or with one of the ambul.ance lines. We're supposed do assessments and stuff I guess, more hands on in a real setting vs mannikins and classmates I guess. We also get to play victim for the bigger paramedic classes. I'm of a double mind about that.

I think in general it would be fun and interesting. I think a 'victim' can learn a lot about giving care by how they're treated and yet....I saw some of them this summer and I am really -not- keen on being strapped to a backboard and hauled around campus. I have this ...we'll call it a thing...about being tied up. It usually doesn't end well. But, I should look at is as a chance to over come!

12 hours and counting :)

Textbooks!

I GOT MY TEXTBOOKS TODAY!!!!

Pre-hospital Emergency Care and Workbook (holy huge!!!!)
Seeley's Anatomy and Physiology (OK, I already had a copy, thanks to my bestest best atheist, but it was still on my list)
and
Last Dance (Psychology of Death and Dying)

plus the assorted class, lecture and lab note books

I'm so excited.

*dives into Pre-Hospital Care*

My mood today

is nicely summed up by this picture I stole from a friends Facebook...

Despite it, I'm damn cheerful. Maybe it's because, as the frog says...well, nevermind. I'm just damned cheerful.

I love my mother

I really do. I mean, I really really really love my mother.

But sometimes she just makes me tired.

Simple squamous epithelium

puts me in mind of a cheesy monster in a kids story...

*narrator voice-over* Long ago and far away, the simple squamous Epithelium ate three tiny children for breakfast...A simple being, he was rather squamous, and just a little squashed, but he had many functions, the least of them being eating children who refused to study their anatomy...

Hairy-

-armpits.

Thinking in bed is a dangerous occupation. But there I was, midnight, laying in my quiet, empty bed and it struck me. I needed to shave my armpits, since it's too damn hot to wear a shirt with sleeves.

And I have to wonder- why is it alright if guys don't shave their armpits?

I mean, seriously. It's almost taboo for a woman NOT to shave, and yet men get by with icky, long under-arm hair? It's just not right. Same with leg hair, but that doesn't bother me quite as bad. I don't, as of yet, have an opinion of other hair, but I'm fairly certain I'll think the same of it as I do of mine. The less the better.

But armpit hair is just...eww.

Hot enough lemonade is nice...

And that's hot, as I don't particularly care for lemonade...

It's 96 F/35 C right now and I'm just flat sick of it. I know that heat indexes are for wusses, but when I see 123 F/50 C anywhere in conjunction with the temperature near me I have fits. I just do. It's flat hot out, and humid. I feel like I'm sitting in a sauna, and unfortunately, opening the door does not lead into a nice cool hallway with showers. But on the upside, it is -slightly- warmer outside than inside. I don't dare go upstairs...

Meh

You know, I'm a rather moody individual. Many blame it on the fact that I'm a woman, except I think it's not. I'm just moody.

I've been shy all day. Part of that is because I was around crowds of people, but part of it is that I was just feeling shy. Granted, mostly it was people I knew and can talk to one on one, but the group kinda turns me off. I did however, for the first time in the three years I've been at this church, work up the courage to help in the kitchens. Took me ages to get my hands to stop shaking.

Now I'm ... well, moody is how I'd usually call it, except I've already used that term. I hate this mood, and I know I should just crawl into bed, take some painkillers and a sleeping pill and sleep it off. I'll feel better in the morning. The thing is, I don't want to. I'm sick of sleeping.

I sleep too much. It's a commonly known fact. Thing is, I don't have anything better to do and I'm bored. You can only read so long, write so much, stare at the computer or zone out at the wall before you simply go mad. Yeah, I could go clean my house, again, but what's the point? Dirt just gets tracked in, and the roommates leave stuff all over. I'm tired of dealing with their crap, and I told them that but...there isn't much short of cleaning it myself that I can do. And I refuse to do that.

Meh. That really just sums everything up. It's late, so I should sleep but I'm sick of sleeping pills that leave me groggy and grouchy in the morning. I'm sick of reading, even though I just got a book I've been waiting for. Hell, I'm even sick of cleaning my room, and heavens knows it needs it again. I systematically organize things into a corner, then as I much out the corner, the junk destroys what was previously ordered. It keeps me busy, except...I'm bored of doing it. I went walking earlier with my camera, but I lost the light too soon so that left me frustrated.

Oh, and my....I guess he would be my great-uncle, but he's not much older than my parents died on Sunday, his funeral was today. I didn't know him well, in fact the last time I remember seeing him was in 2004 I think, but I called my grandmother to make sure she was alright and...well, the whole thing is just kinda bitter to me.

All my life I've wanted to be close to my family. Actually, to better frame it, I've wanted a family. Technically, I have a huge one. My father has five sib's, there are 11 of us grandkids, and probably near 100 other relatives. I haven't seen any of them in over a year. I haven't spoken to my father in over three, and only one of my sisters that live with him in that time. My mom's side isn't much better. I've seen my aunt once in five years, and my cousin. My mom, paternal grandmother and two aunts are the only that I talk to, and my mom is the only constant I have.

And, I love her to death, but she...well, we disagree on a lot of things. And I end up whining to a small box on a pretend-wood desk that plays music for me.

I always knew I was alone, but in the end? It's not what I want.

I know it's cheesy and pointless, doubly so given that I basically live the life of a hermit, but I want someone. Just a friend who I can go to, whine and cry at, or tease and pester. Someone who'll understand when I just need someone to be there.

Gah. This is ridiculous. I'm going to bed before I end up thinking myself into a do-something-stupid hole. At least staring at the dark ceiling is sorta productive. Meh.

Whoop Whoop

I PASSED BIOLOGY!!!

WTF is a tetraploid?

Yeah, it's a religious rant...

First off, I'd like to say this is not meant to offend anyone. If it does, go stick your head in the sand.

Browsing the BBC (yes, I'm aware I should be studying, bite me) I found this today. I'm not a keen fan of Micky Mouse, for the simple fact that mice give me the heebie jeebies, but it makes me wonder.

I'm a Christian, my best friend is an obnoxious heathen and I've got family who are Mormon, Catholic and other random things. It doesn't  bother me. I can't, and won't force my opinion or beliefs on anyone. I might share them, but what a person believes is up to him.

Now, to tie in the news article. My bestest best atheist buddy often sends me rather derogatory (if usually humorous) dipictions of various aspects of my faith. I usually laugh, or say 'hmmm, lol'. It's not something I'm going to get worked up over. This sorta springs to mind, or a number on that site. Some are downright hilarious, some are rude, and others, I'm sure, would gain a fatwah from various Muslim clerics.

Seriously though, who cares? I've got the right to express my opinion, whether it be in blog, picture or shouted from the rooftop of the Eifel Tower (granted, I've never been to the top of the Tower, and I doubt I've an opinion worth shouting from there) but the point is: Get over yourselves.

Now, if I were to come out and say: "Abdullah, I think you are a pork-sucking, dog-loving, flea infested scumbag and your religion is less than the crap on the bottom of my shoes" and hand him a picture of himself with a large red X through it, then I can definately see reason for discord. Even a fatwah. Yeah, I can see that.

But over a stupid cartoon? When everyday thousands of cartoons of Jesus, the Buddha, Abraham- the list goes on- are made, distributed and laughed at?

What makes Islam so damn important that it can't take a frakking joke? Seriously, my turban-wearing-brothers, get a freaking grip and learn to laugh.

Chess

At two am.

I was a graceful loser, he was a graceful winner. It was an awesome game.

Greatest test question ever!

General Bio, test three:

The end step of fermentation results in_______

random answer
random answer
the destruction of Sauron's ring
recycling of NADH to NAD+

I was beyond tempted...

Mitosis...

Check

*bragging*

I rock.

Three weeks into summer semester...

...and my intro to EMS class is done. I enjoyed it, a lot actually. I really like the fact I got to wear a uniform again, I've missed that (yes, I'm one of those weirdo's who like uniforms....both to drool over the fine manly specimens and to wear). I think it has something to do with CDO and possibly anxiety. It's something that's controlled, that has a standard that I can meet. Ah well.

Anyway, I enjoyed the class. Two weeks left of biology. I got a 106% on my first test and am eagerly awaiting the results of the one I took today.

I couldn't remember the shapes of fungi DNA and...something else. Or who said all biology makes sense through evolution, or something like that. Ah well. I'm happy with a B...not.

Karma..

...is a bitch

I...

...must...study...*snores*

Brilliance...

Two fellow EMS students, coming from class...

Girl 1: "...it's funny. Made my tongue feel weird...(something something) lidocaine..."
Girl 2: *with a disbelieving laugh and slightly derisive voice* "...that's because none of us were stupid enough to taste the unknown substance."

Classes started today...

Intro to EMS and Biology.

I'm told my biology course rivals the European high school course. Oh well, I'll still learn something.

I like my EMS class (the whole one session I've had so far). We discussed the difference between EMT and Paramedics. Highly entertaining.

Oh, and I have to get a uniform. Who'da thunk?

I start biology...

On Tuesday.

It's a one month course, covering the material in a normal semester, so I got a head start today.

Thank you, you know who you are. I mean it, a lot. Even if this is high school to you *g*

*brain implodes*

Screw this...

...I'm nervous.

I'm not going to pretend any more that I ain't.

Oh, and I'm never watching videos on the surgery that's about to be performed on me, ever ever ever again.

Bring on the Jamison.

Dreams...

In preparation for my upcoming trip to the hospital I decided to wax my legs. Not a bad idea, if I say so myself, since I'm fairly sure I won't want to (translation: will refuse to) shave for a bit afterwards. And I like it, but we don't need to go there.

So, a good idea all around, or so I thought. Evidently my imaginary friend (my main fan-fic character) caught an echo of my thoughts. Normally this is no bad thing either, since she's usually got a fairly good sense of humor about my 21st Century oddities.

However, when I dream about my 9th Century Anglo-Saxon equivalent mixing candle wax and honey to test out this hair removing phenomenon I start to worry about myself. Or her. I think she's finally lost it.

On the upside, the hospital woke me up before I found out the results of her experimenting.

Checklist

1. Find/buy/steal/beg A Clash of Kings, A Storm of Swords and A Feast of Crows [2/3]
2. Sleep [0/2]
3. Punch Glen (again) [2/3]
4. Help fellow student pass Oral Exam [0/1]
5. Take final [0/1]
6. Register at new school and turn in paperwork [0/1] (Biology or Anatomy? Decisions, decisions...)
7. Dash back to old school to take Oral Exam [0/1]
8. Write three reaction papers and one final research paper [0/4]...oops, I really should start that...
9. Shower
10. Have surgery [0/1]

I think, when it comes down to it, I'm slightly behind.

Perhaps We Should Start With Introductions

Hi.

I'm not going to tell you who I am. Those who know have a reason to, and those who don't, well, they don't have a reason to.

I'm 24, and starting the process of getting my paramedic's license (if I don't go insane first). I live with two roommates, a close friend and her brother, and a plethora of imaginary friends*.

I started this as a mainly anonymous place to rant, whine, piss or otherwise yell. Normally I'm a fairly even tempered individual but...well, we'll see.

*I write fan-fic and spend more time with my characters than most 'normal' humans. Don't judge me.